The Great Days

Butterfly Girl had a wonderful day yesterday. That translates into me having an incredible day too. When it all goes well, our whole house seems to float. The vibe is relaxed. But having a wonderful day is no walk in the park. It still takes effort- diligently staying 5 steps ahead of Butterfly. Making quick adjustments to steer from disaster. But, on days like yesterday, the whole family has a chance to recharge.

And I love to watch Butterfly on the great days. Her heart is so kind and patient. She showed Brother how to play "fairy" on the computer. Then showed him how to paint trains, gently redirecting Brother at times. He was full of pride- when Butterfly takes time to play with him, when she is patient and gentle, he is on top of the world.

Partner and I talk about how Butterfly's behavior impacts Brother. At only 3 years old, he has seen some pretty hard stuff with his big sister. Tantrums in the car, screaming fits, throwing, kicking and hitting fits. Sometimes he gets scared. Sometimes he cries. We try to remove him when possible but often it just isn't possible. We talk with him, give him love. And then, when Butterfly has a wonderful day, he soars too. We all do.

Once a Therapist told me that wasn't healthy. Butterfly should not be in charge of the day- whether it is good or bad for everyone. I agree in theory. I agree in the little office with the comfortable couch, framed displays of higher education dotting the walls, nice views. But it is not practical. When Butterfly has a crappy day, so do I. It takes a lot out of me. I live for the great days. I love them.