Growing Up

It has been so long since I have written. Butterfly is doing very well. She has adjusted with the move. She has settled down since the visitors have slowed. She was happy and playful over Spring break. She has been communicating her feelings and needs- probably does it better than me. I am afraid alot of that went out the window when we were moving. It is hard to be mindful when everything else is happening - and of course, it is the most important time to be mindful.  I'm still learning.

Yesterday I was struck by how much things have changed when she was playing with a boy. These two both have had hard times using words instead of hands, having explosive episodes, etc. We have actually known them a couple years and we have both sen the more challenging moments for each others families. The kids have really hurt each other a few times- so badly that on different occasions we have had to take long breaks from seeing each other. 

But over Spring break, they played together and worked through any incidents that came up. It was really remarkable. Yesterday when her friend left, I told Butterfly that she and her friend had really negotiated and compromised to make their play date go smoothly. And she looked at me and said "Well, what do you expect? That we would hit it each other and yell? We are older now and don't do that anymore." 

That made me laugh. Could it really be that a real change has taken place?  That the length of time between compulsive and aggressive incidents has really stretched so far that it feels almost "normal"? Could it be that Butterfly is finally feeling safe with her own feelings? 

Today, I am just going to take a deep breath and let what changes have happened becoming fully apparent to me. I feel like I  need to stop and catch up on everything that has happened since January when we moved to the new school.  It has changed our lives.  Today, I am going to be thankful for my precious little girl and the changes she is embracing. Butterfly is growing up.